Teach me the secrets of English grammar!

valcik

So Old I'm Losing Radiation Signs
Are you a native English speaker? Do you find poorly written messages to be annoying as hell? Are you willing to help other people? If so, unleash your inner teacher in this thread and make this place somewhat less annoying. Feel free to rip my posts apart, copy-paste any broken sentence with poor syntax, misspelled words, or other garbage here with your correction, please. Don't be afraid to elaborate if you feel so, have good laugh as well, jump on your high horse if you want. Let me assure you that I won't find it offensive in any way. Thanks in advance!

(As long as other folks with poor English are willing to participate in this experiment, just raise your hand here, so your posts could be ripped apart freely as well.)
 
Are you a native English speaker? Do you find poorly written messages to be annoying as hell? Are you willing to help other
Yes, no, and yes. Learning a new language is not easy for everybody and language is a fluid, undefined 'thing' as it is. It's ever changing and people from other nations naturally form their own little idiosyncrasies. Though good grammar is important for academic discourse, in colloquial discussion picking it apart is often quite unfair and unreasonable.

Frankly, your hold of the language is very good, and I can see you having few problems with discussion, work, and translation at this level (well above 27% :razz:). You are fully comprehensible and you make good use of more complex language and sentence structures.
 
Last edited:
I also wish to become more experienced in the English language. I am capable of the basics but some of the details such as the various verbs, conjugations, all that stuff that can make a sentence feel more smooth or organic than just some dead information text.
If I had the money I would have been following classes.
 
You want to know the secrets of grammar?


 
Last edited by a moderator:
Just to make it 100% - feel free to copy/paste and correct broken English you've spotted in other threads as well! This is about grammar, no matter whether you'll grab it in general discussion, modding forum, or any other. (Also, I'll irradiate you badly, so be prepared for that.)
 
Well something I'd say is rather important to expressing ideas is use of a serial comma in asyndetic lists. Well worth looking into that, as it provides clarity and follows the rhythms of speech much more than when it is excluded.
 
Why are knicks and knight spelled with "n", wtf?
When do you use two letters instead of one (exp: "success")?
Why does "genuinely" sound sound completely different than it's written?
When does one use ";"?

Languages suck ass, and balls.
 
Last edited:
Languages change over time no matter what. It's just that most people don't notice because it's a gradual enough process that changes to lexicons happen without most people really noticing.
 
The grammar of english (probably many other languages too) will be utter shit in a 100 years or so, when people will say - "ur rong cuz...", and will have to learn, to write that in a completely unfamiliar way.
Sad but true; it's already like that in many places here. You can hear English spoken, and not understand a word of it.

**In an hundred years, 'Newspeak' will exist as a functional (if limited) vocabulary for the masses; and they won't even know that its origins lay in a fiction that describes their predicament... and unwittingly served as a blueprint for it.
 
Last edited:
Languages change over time no matter what. It's just that most people don't notice because it's a gradual enough process that changes to lexicons happen without most people really noticing.

Yes, everything gets shortened, though at various degrees of time. In my native language (lithuanian) i can still read and understand a book from 1500', so in my language you spell as it is written. This is why i often find english a bit crazy.
 
Are you a native English speaker? Do you find poorly written messages to be annoying as hell? Are you willing to help other people? If so, unleash your inner teacher in this thread and make this place somewhat less annoying. Feel free to rip my posts apart, copy-paste any broken sentence with poor syntax, misspelled words, or other garbage here with your correction, please. Don't be afraid to elaborate if you feel so, have good laugh as well, jump on your high horse if you want. Let me assure you that I won't find it offensive in any way. Thanks in advance!

(As long as other folks with poor English are willing to participate in this experiment, just raise your hand here, so your posts could be ripped apart freely as well.)
Hmm, I usually prefer just addressing grammatical mistakes with corrections in their quotes (if I'm addressing the individual) highlighted by brackets, or if they're douchebags who rushed their message so they could share their douchery, highlight the fixed errors in bold. Most of the time, however, I prefer private messages. A couple people feel like they're... well, NOT "lost causes", just not far along in the process of learning English that I doubt little pointers will help them. Not naming any names, but I think a couple of you guys might be able to think of one poster here who fits the bill. NOT saying he's an idiot or a bad guy. Just saying... I don't think he's progressed far enough for a few tips to be of help. But hey, I could be totally mistaken.

I'm mostly all for what you're saying, though I don't know what that "jump on your high horse if you want" part was about. Correcting errors isn't really a matter of arrogance, after all. While language may be subject to change, it changes over GENERATIONS, so there are present states of appropriateness in any given language. Anything else is, rightfully, regarded as either slang or linguistic butchery. Most are quick to jump to the conclusion that the latter is always the case. But anyway, not every spelling or grammar correction is someone being a "Grammar Nazi".

I suppose I would've preferred to keep my methods largely to PMs, though the prospect of "other folks with poor English are willing to participate" does make a public effort of addressing these errors much more effective to a larger group of people.

Regardless, you gotta MAKE some mistakes in order for them to receive corrections, so... get typing! =P

Languages change over time no matter what. It's just that most people don't notice because it's a gradual enough process that changes to lexicons happen without most people really noticing.

Yes, everything gets shortened, though at various degrees of time. In my native language (lithuanian) i can still read and understand a book from 1500', so in my language you spell as it is written. This is why i often find english a bit crazy.
I'm often reminded of words my Uncle said when we were traveling Europe while I was in my teens. A fluent speaker of several languages, Serbian (mother tongue) and German being two, he once went on a tirade about how "German language is SO STUPID! One sound, THREE letters! Serbian language is PERFECT! One sound, ONE letter!" The thought of it makes me smile, even now. It was a lovely, hilarious, and endearing moment to share with family while all-too happy to get out of a cramped bus.

As for English..... it's a conquered language. It follows rules that then turn around and break themselves and say they're "exceptions" all the time because it's a language made as an amalgamation of several other languages. I enjoy my handle of it, but I'm not necessarily "in love with" English, despite the fact that it's my first language. I enjoy Serbian and Japanese much more. Studying those languages has been a real delight for me, over the years.
 
Last edited:
I'm often reminded of words my Uncle said when we were traveling Europe while I was in my teens. A fluent speaker of several languages, Serbian (mother tongue) and German being two, he once went on a tirade about how "German language is SO STUPID! One sound, THREE letters! Serbian language is PERFECT! One sound, ONE letter!" The thought of it makes me smile, even now. It was a lovely, hilarious, and endearing moment to share with family while all-too happy to get out of a cramped bus.

As for English..... it's a conquered language. It follows rules that then turn around and break themselves and say they're "exceptions" all the time because it's a language made as an amalgamation of several other languages. I enjoy my handle of it, but I'm not necessarily "in love with" English, despite the fact that it's my first language. I enjoy Serbian and Japanese much more. Studying those languages has been a real delight for me, over the years.

I have tried to learn german (still haven't) and the der, die, das drived me crazy. I have a bit of a hold on russian (limited ability to read and speak), and it seems to be pretty good for literature and cursing (if you want to be a real master at cursing, learn russian), but the grammar is pretty hard to learn. I wish though there were a logical, minimalistic global language for everyone to use on the internet, so that there were less barriers in communication (read about Lojban today, will have to check it out).
 
Last edited:
Lojban is an interesting concept, but it's too far removed from all the naturally developed languages to ever spead widely.
It's useless as an everyday language, but it (or a successor) might be used as a scientific language (as it's supposed to).
Esperanto, Folkspraak and Interlingua (to name a few) are really interesting, although I don't see them catching on any time soon.
English (or Basic English or some sort of City-Speak-esque creole language) will be the language of the Internet for a very long time to come.
 
Last edited:
Lojban is an interesting concept, but it's too far removed from all the naturally developed languages to ever spead widely.
It's useless as an everyday language, but it (or a successor) might be used as a scientific language (as it's supposed to).
Esperanto, Folkspraak and Interlingua (to name a few) are really interesting, although I don't see them catching on any time soon.
English (or Basic English or some sort of City-Speak-esque creole language) will be the language of the Internet for a very long time to come.

From what i understand Esperanto, Folkspraak and Interlingua are based on romantic languages, so that doesn't bode well for the "global" part.
 
Lojban is an interesting concept, but it's too far removed from all the naturally developed languages to ever spead widely.
It's useless as an everyday language, but it (or a successor) might be used as a scientific language (as it's supposed to).
Esperanto, Folkspraak and Interlingua (to name a few) are really interesting, although I don't see them catching on any time soon.
English (or Basic English or some sort of City-Speak-esque creole language) will be the language of the Internet for a very long time to come.

From what i understand Esperanto, Folkspraak and Interlingua are based on romantic languages, so that doesn't bode well for the "global" part.

Esperanto and Interlingua are both based mostly on romanic roots, yes. Folkspraak went the opposite way and focuses on the germanic roots. It's kinda fascinating, basically everyone who speaks (Northern) Low German, Swedish, Danish, Icelandic or Norwegian can readily understand Folkspraak.

Languages continue to evolve and is heavily dependent on social surroundings. It's unlikely that at least spoken languages will ever be fixed and controlled like written languages, the world simply changes to quickly for that.
 
Languages continue to evolve and is heavily dependent on social surroundings. It's unlikely that at least spoken languages will ever be fixed and controlled like written languages, the world simply changes to quickly for that.

Well, if people would still have their native languages, but also learned one neutral, short, logical, global language to communicate with people around the world, it might work.

Or... Fuck languages, we need brain waves to communicate the complete depth of a message one is trying to convey. I hope we reach that phase someday.
 
This may be woefully historically incorrect, but wasn't Esparanto made with that sort of thing in mind?

IDK, the dying of languages happens for many reasons. Suppression of native languages is a hot topic (and with good reason), but that doesn't happen much now, to my knowledge.
 
Yes, the concept of a Trade Language. But even those evolve into Pidgin- and later Creole languages more often than not.
I doubt that there will ever be a language that everyone on this planet will understand.

/edit: Esperanto was supposed to be a european language. Stupidly enough it ignored the largest linguistic contributor to Europe, the germanic languages. As I said, Folkspraak basically tried the same, but in the opposite direction. I never heard of a true World-Language, though.
 
Last edited:
Back
Top