jschmo6766
First time out of the vault

"you were critically hit in the head for 0 damage. the bruise will look nice and make for good party talk."
okay.
"you critically missed and lost your next turn."
I'll just assume I completely missed... a lot harder than usual, then. right.
"tough alien was hit for 0 damage.
tough alien was hit for 20 damage.
tough alien was critically hit in the eye for 3 damage." (same person attacking it)
"tough sm deathclaw was hit for 2 damage.
Sulik missed.
tough sm deathclaw was hit for 0 damage.
tough sm deathclaw was critically hit in the head for 219 damage. the blow knocks him unconscious. tough sm deathclaw was killed." (b4 or after he was knocked unconscious though? oh, it doesn't matter? yeah, that's my point) (btw, same attacker again)
dice rolls are fine. 4-7 damage makes sense. 100-150 damage with another type of weapon against the same enemy makes sense. 0 to infinite damage doesn't make sense, it just feels random and ridiculous. applying status effects to enemies that die simultaneously regardless doesn't make sense.
- at any point in the game, you can randomly run into gangs of radscorpions/wilders/cannibals/golden geckos that do negligible damage... or run into massive amounts of master's army/enclave/fire breathing geckos that will kill a party member in one round before you get a chance to heal them.
-oh I'm sorry, that's not always a random occurrence, let me update that last point. sometimes this bullshit is actually SCRIPTED: at the military base for example, first you have to fight 12 wolves which entails WAITING for each of them to attack 3 times each (for 0 damage if they don't miss) b4 you can finally kill one of them (assuming your brain hasn't fried from watching and hearing "RAW-RAWF" 36 fucking times by then). then you must wait for the remaining 11 to attack 3 times each b4 killing the 2nd one, and so on.... UGH.
break for singing, sing it with me: 12 mobs of wolves on the screen, 12 mobs of wolves! first you wait, then you kill one, 11 mobs of wolves on the screen! 11 mobs of wolves on the screen, 11 mobs of wolves! first you wait, then you kill one, 10 mobs of wolves on the screen! 10 mobs of wolves on the screen, 10 mobs of wolves! first you wait, then you kill one................................................
a few thousand less hairs, an extra bag under each eye, and 3 more wrinkles on your face later:
then of course you look at the mine cart and "your" observation basically instructs you to do something that you'd have never otherwise done: attach the metal pole to the cart, then attach dynamite to the metal pole, b/c "you" thought that it was a great plan. stupid. then you're inside the military base and face packs of rats that also deal negligible or 0 damage. it's just as much of a snore fest. then the next level of this dungeon? 15 super mutants that kill a party member in a single round b4 you can act. even if you get to act, you won't be able to target a party member to heal them b/c they're entirely obscured by the mass of pixels that's supposed to be your enemy - which prevents you from clicking on your ally, which is for some reason the only way that you can target your ally. what a joke. I doubt the devs ever even played this game or that they had anyone playtest it. I HAVE AN IDEA! HOW ABOUT IF YOU HOLD THE CONTROL KEY, YOU CAN CLICK STRAIGHT THROUGH ENEMIES TO THE ALLY THAT THEY'RE BLOCKING? IS THAT SUCH A LOFTY CONCEPT?
-the combat is 95% WAITING for others to act, 4% clicking on an enemy to damage or ally to heal, and 1% praying. it's the worst combat system of any game I've ever played. by a lot. yet somehow I remember enjoying FO1. maybe random encounters didn't treat me so poorly or they weren't as random or there were more encounters in between ridiculously easy and statistically impossible.
-the quests consist of one or more of the following: A) talk to someone. B) run from point A to point B. C) kill something. D) acquire something. A through D are all "accomplished" by clicking and nothing more, ever.
-the weapons are either not necessary or they won't do significant damage b/c the enemies are either lvl 1 or 999999, only aliens and sometimes deathclaws are seemingly anywhere in between. what a shame that 90%+ of the effort that went into making this game was in variety of weapons when only a handful are viable against the only enemies that matter.
but what makes up for the worst combat of all time? the fact that by clicking through dialogue you can either make group A friendlier and group B hostile or vice versa, according to a rabid group of diehard fanboys that should be calling their doctors instead of playing this old steaming pile b/c their raging hard ons for it have lasted much longer than is healthy or anywhere close to normal. "consequence" you call it. simple change of text in reality. are you out of your fucking minds or what?
yeah, yeah, I know: "OOOOH-OOH, BUT MR. J SCHMO SIX-SEVEN-SIX-SI-IIIIIIIII-IIIX...THEIR DIALOGUE CHANGES BASED ON MY 'CHOIRCERRRRRRS'!!!! MAH-YYY CHAAAAAAAARRCERRRRRRSSSS!" obnoxious....
"choice," lol, bunch of dumbass believers in here, aren't you all? enjoy your silly, childish illusion of choice and suffer through this terribly designed game for it, you poor delusional clowns.
okay.
"you critically missed and lost your next turn."
I'll just assume I completely missed... a lot harder than usual, then. right.
"tough alien was hit for 0 damage.
tough alien was hit for 20 damage.
tough alien was critically hit in the eye for 3 damage." (same person attacking it)
"tough sm deathclaw was hit for 2 damage.
Sulik missed.
tough sm deathclaw was hit for 0 damage.
tough sm deathclaw was critically hit in the head for 219 damage. the blow knocks him unconscious. tough sm deathclaw was killed." (b4 or after he was knocked unconscious though? oh, it doesn't matter? yeah, that's my point) (btw, same attacker again)
dice rolls are fine. 4-7 damage makes sense. 100-150 damage with another type of weapon against the same enemy makes sense. 0 to infinite damage doesn't make sense, it just feels random and ridiculous. applying status effects to enemies that die simultaneously regardless doesn't make sense.
- at any point in the game, you can randomly run into gangs of radscorpions/wilders/cannibals/golden geckos that do negligible damage... or run into massive amounts of master's army/enclave/fire breathing geckos that will kill a party member in one round before you get a chance to heal them.
-oh I'm sorry, that's not always a random occurrence, let me update that last point. sometimes this bullshit is actually SCRIPTED: at the military base for example, first you have to fight 12 wolves which entails WAITING for each of them to attack 3 times each (for 0 damage if they don't miss) b4 you can finally kill one of them (assuming your brain hasn't fried from watching and hearing "RAW-RAWF" 36 fucking times by then). then you must wait for the remaining 11 to attack 3 times each b4 killing the 2nd one, and so on.... UGH.
break for singing, sing it with me: 12 mobs of wolves on the screen, 12 mobs of wolves! first you wait, then you kill one, 11 mobs of wolves on the screen! 11 mobs of wolves on the screen, 11 mobs of wolves! first you wait, then you kill one, 10 mobs of wolves on the screen! 10 mobs of wolves on the screen, 10 mobs of wolves! first you wait, then you kill one................................................
a few thousand less hairs, an extra bag under each eye, and 3 more wrinkles on your face later:
then of course you look at the mine cart and "your" observation basically instructs you to do something that you'd have never otherwise done: attach the metal pole to the cart, then attach dynamite to the metal pole, b/c "you" thought that it was a great plan. stupid. then you're inside the military base and face packs of rats that also deal negligible or 0 damage. it's just as much of a snore fest. then the next level of this dungeon? 15 super mutants that kill a party member in a single round b4 you can act. even if you get to act, you won't be able to target a party member to heal them b/c they're entirely obscured by the mass of pixels that's supposed to be your enemy - which prevents you from clicking on your ally, which is for some reason the only way that you can target your ally. what a joke. I doubt the devs ever even played this game or that they had anyone playtest it. I HAVE AN IDEA! HOW ABOUT IF YOU HOLD THE CONTROL KEY, YOU CAN CLICK STRAIGHT THROUGH ENEMIES TO THE ALLY THAT THEY'RE BLOCKING? IS THAT SUCH A LOFTY CONCEPT?
-the combat is 95% WAITING for others to act, 4% clicking on an enemy to damage or ally to heal, and 1% praying. it's the worst combat system of any game I've ever played. by a lot. yet somehow I remember enjoying FO1. maybe random encounters didn't treat me so poorly or they weren't as random or there were more encounters in between ridiculously easy and statistically impossible.
-the quests consist of one or more of the following: A) talk to someone. B) run from point A to point B. C) kill something. D) acquire something. A through D are all "accomplished" by clicking and nothing more, ever.
-the weapons are either not necessary or they won't do significant damage b/c the enemies are either lvl 1 or 999999, only aliens and sometimes deathclaws are seemingly anywhere in between. what a shame that 90%+ of the effort that went into making this game was in variety of weapons when only a handful are viable against the only enemies that matter.
but what makes up for the worst combat of all time? the fact that by clicking through dialogue you can either make group A friendlier and group B hostile or vice versa, according to a rabid group of diehard fanboys that should be calling their doctors instead of playing this old steaming pile b/c their raging hard ons for it have lasted much longer than is healthy or anywhere close to normal. "consequence" you call it. simple change of text in reality. are you out of your fucking minds or what?
yeah, yeah, I know: "OOOOH-OOH, BUT MR. J SCHMO SIX-SEVEN-SIX-SI-IIIIIIIII-IIIX...THEIR DIALOGUE CHANGES BASED ON MY 'CHOIRCERRRRRRS'!!!! MAH-YYY CHAAAAAAAARRCERRRRRRSSSS!" obnoxious....
"choice," lol, bunch of dumbass believers in here, aren't you all? enjoy your silly, childish illusion of choice and suffer through this terribly designed game for it, you poor delusional clowns.