Things we learned from Fallout 4

Brahmin Noodles

Brahmin Noodles

Still Mildly Glowing
This thread is based of a similar one for Fallout 3, which I enjoyed, so I figured I'd make a similar one for FO4. I'll start us off:
1: A Mister Handy robot can survive a nuclear explosion with nothing more than a few dings and scratches, then go on to function perfectly for 200+ years with NO maintenance.
 
4: I learned that robots need lovin' too. (No, seriously, I understand if it is part of their programming to deliver 'us' pleasure but a robot wanting pleasure doesn't make much sense to me but apparently in Bethesda's world robots can feel lust)
 
-Ghouls are zombies
-Super mutants are orcs
-The commonwealth has a 20-1 monster to regular NPC ratio
-Preston always says another settlement needs saving
-People rather live in rotting wooden huts instead of places nearby with a solid foundation with water and other things
-Raiders and other enemy types will march from one end of the map to the other to harass a settlement for their rusting tin cans lying around
-Institute is made up of braindead idiots that spent 200 years figuring out something that West Tek discovered in a year and the former also created super orcs for no reason
 
1: A Mister Handy robot can survive a nuclear explosion with nothing more than a few dings and scratches, then go on to function perfectly for 200+ years with NO maintenance.
2: Ghouls don´t understand their own biology.
3: Ghouls can survive inside a refrigerator for 200 years without any food and/or water.
4: Robots need lovin' too.
5: Ghouls are zombies.
6: Super mutants are large green humans that like placing complex traps every where.
7: The commonwealth has a 50:1 monster to regular NPC ratio.
8: Preston always says another settlement needs saving.
9: People rather live in rotting wooden huts instead of places nearby with a solid foundation with water and other things
10: Raiders and other enemy types will march from one end of the map to the other to harass a settlement for their rusting tin cans lying around.
11: Institute is made up of brain-dead idiots that spent 200 years figuring out something that West Tek discovered in a year and the former also created super orcs for no reason.
12: Institute makes slave robots with free will so they can play can and mouse with their slaves for no reason.
13: Vertibirds are 3 seater dragons.
14: Console players like to shoot things.
15: Fallout fans prefer "busy-time" as opposed to player agency.
16: Raiders, Zombies and Super Mutants do not need human beings to replenish their numbers.
17: Every Raider places teddy bears and pink flamingos in strange and 'funny' position in every single area of the map.
18: Boston has 33 easy to obtain Power Armor Suits free for the taking.
19: RPG does not mean anything.
20: When someone says Fallout now it means Fallout 4 specifically.
21: When Bethesda says that your companions can not die, what they mean to say is that they are part of the main quest.
22: Anyone can be a member of the BOS, if they follow Palidin Dance Dance Revolution.
23: Lowering one's expectations does not eliminate disappointment.
24: Jesus Juice is milked from the man in the jail wearing a funny hat.
25: Jet was actually made BEFORE the war, so I guess Myron is retconed!
26: Bethesda has sold out as they claimed to have played 1 and 2 (Not Pete Hines Marking and PR) and what they like the most about those games, now not including them into Sellout 4.
 
Last edited:
Not only is that one TV show on the History Channel (seriously, why the fuck is it on the HISTORY channel) "Ancient Aliens" completely true, but apparently people have known about its existence since the 1800s. Apparently fashionable alien helmets make you not only immortal, but give you the same DR as Power Armor, lets you literally levitate, have telekenesis, and allow you to communicate with said aliens.

Let's also not forget that Fallout 4 taught us that, by freeing strange men from prison and helping them kill their family, you'll be rewarded with Jesus Juice. So long as you get this Jesus Juice, you are guaranteed eternal life, along with a bonus 50 DR and immunity to all radiation. And it's unlimited. You can go get more from him whenever you want.

I hate this game so much.
 
^ Fuck, you had to remind me about the Cabot House...
26: Jet was actually made BEFORE the war, so I guess Myron is retconed! Which leads us to...
27: No one at Bethesda has ever played Fallout 2 (or probably any of the classics)
 
Oh yeah, how could we forget?

28: Magic exists because there's both enchanted weapons and enemies that can restore their health to full and start glowing after taking 2 bullets, known in some circles as "legendaries".

and 28.5: Because Magic exists, that clearly means the Fallout universe is tied in with the Elder Scrolls universe. Confirmed. Expect a crossover soon.
 
29: 10 years ago it took decades of work, a magic matter rearranger, and some super science to build a damn water purifier. Now it takes the god on earth Sole Survivor a few minutes to build one for his settlement.
 
You can fuck most of your followers despite the fact that you just saw your husband die.

Ghouls are immortal rotting angels that don't need to eat or poop and can stay in metal bawkses for centuries with no ill effects.

 
31: None of your followers cares in the slightest if you eat someone right in front of them. No, actually I'm wrong. A few of them will like you slightly less. Hell, somtimes they may even comment negatively towards it! C&C!
 
You must log in or register to reply here.
Back
Top