CT Phipps' review of Fallout 4

Pretty much, yeah.

I get to play in a radioactive post-apocalypse wasteland which is fun and full of fascinating characters and science fiction oddities.

That forgives much.

Is there any setting as good?

I don't get how you can cite so many criticisms and then just shrug and give it a 9/10. What would it get if all of your criticisms of the game were, through some miracle, fixed with a patch? Are all of those things only worth 1 point?
 
I don't get how you can cite so many criticisms and then just shrug and give it a 9/10. What would it get if all of your criticisms of the game were, through some miracle, fixed with a patch? Are all of those things only worth 1 point?

Ultimately, the measure of the game is whether it's fun or not. Whether I enjoy playing it. Whether I got my money's worth. I suppose it helps to know I do have the 11/10 which are "the best video games of all time" that Fallout 4 isn't on the list of.

You might argue that makes no sense but I point out 4 star movies exist all the time but there's rarely a Citizen Kane. Whether I love a game or not is not a game of mathematics but a game of feeling.

What would bring it up to the level of Fallout: New Vegas and Fallout 3? That's a tough question.

* A new dialogue system and acting which would require re-recording all of their lines pretty much and adding way more lore.
* Fixing the lore (more Lone Wanderer, no T-60 armor, no Jet)
* Fixing the Institute so they make some goddamn sense in motivation and actions
* More sidequests and less empty settlements.
* Give every companion a quest
* Ending Slides

Fuck, I'd be happy with the game just if there was Ending Slides. Maybe if I wasn't a naturally generous person, I'd go as low as 8.5 but I am naturally generous and I still had 120 hours of fun visiting the Commonwealth.

Anyone want me to review Automatron?
 
So wouldn't a better system of evaluation for you be out of 1?

Either it's fun (1/1)
...or it's not (0/1)

Yeah, I try to measure how much fun basically from 5-10.

5 is the bare minumum to get me to play. Anything lower and I'll just quit.

6 is fun but not really and you're better off with something else.

7 is fun and worth playing, 8 is a GOOD game.

9 is an excellent game.

10 is a game I loved and will cherish.
 
Yeah, I try to measure how much fun basically from 5-10.

5 is the bare minumum to get me to play. Anything lower and I'll just quit.

6 is fun but not really and you're better off with something else.

7 is fun and worth playing, 8 is a GOOD game.

9 is an excellent game.

10 is a game I loved and will cherish.

No, I think you should stick to the 1/1 system which I just developed. I dub it the Phipps Scale.

If were to evaluate Fallout 4, using the Phipps Scale, I would give it a hearty 0/0. Because not only was it not fun, fun wasn't possible.
 
I'm guessing 8/10?

If I was just judging the game's story? Yes...err, no, not even then. Maybe a 6 out of 10.

But no, I have to judge the entire damn thing and it's sense of condescending, "Wouldn't you prefer to play with one of these educational geography toys versus GI Joe?"

Automatron is difficult to review because it's a DLC which pisses me off and yet has some pretty good moments. Over at CD Projekt Red, they give away dozens of tiny little DLC which I would have been willing to pay a few bucks for and I appreciate them for that kind of fanservice. Their DLC, "Blood and Wine" and "Heart of Stone" are effectively 20 hour expansions which as far as I'm concerned, qualify as legitimate games in their own right which could have been sold in stores with no problem on my part. Hell, I've often commented that I wish they'd just release smaller Fallout and Dragon Age games than try these 100+ hour things.

Automatron pisses me off, though, because it's a shameless cash-in on the gamer as you have this series of three or four adventures with a couple of dungeons at the end. The entire thing is really just a cover for the damned "Robot Maker" supplement which Bethesda thinks, like the Settlement System, is something I give a shit about.

I don't like Crafting, I don't like Mods (Armor or Weapons), and I don't want to build a bunch of Robot settlers. Maybe I might want to BUY some Protectrons as settlers and send them to supplement my ONE Settlement but I don't want to fucking spend MORE time gathering garbage to make a body for Codsworth. The design philosophy behind the game is giving a few quests and a story for those who actually enjoy, you know, PLAYING FALLOUT and then forcing you to go through all the crap the DLC is trying to get you enjoyed in.

I enjoyed the Automatron quest, I enjoyed seeing the Mechanist again (after a fashion), and I like the idea of having a Factory of My OwnTM. As a man who wants to rebuild the Commonwealth, it'd be great! You know, except for the fact it's a FACTORY POWERED BY HUMAN BRAINS.

Jesus, seeing all those RoboBrains working at the computer console horrified me at the end! Why the fuck would I want to operate this factory unless I was a psychopath? You just put me through a asylum of poor mentally ill people put to death and harvested for parts. That's some Hitler level shit, there! Did the Hispanic teenage roboticist not not notice that crap? In any case, it's not long enough to matter as the entirety of the Season Pass experience is mostly taken up by trying to turn a first person shooter RPG into Minecraft.

I liked Ada and the twist but....honestly, I wouldn't have bought this without the story mission and that just leaves a bunch of stuff I'll never use. I feel cheated in a way because the focus on the damn crafting in it and the other craft-based DLC felt like this took up the space which should have been devoted to making a third and fourth expansion pack. If I was referring the story, I might give it an six out of 10 but it's the sheer waste of it that spoiled the experience. It was also poorly balanced for someone not wearing Power Armor and focused on keeping us from actually playing Fallout to playing Modder.

4/10
 
If I was just judging the game's story? Yes...err, no, not even then. Maybe a 6 out of 10.

But no, I have to judge the entire damn thing and it's sense of condescending, "Wouldn't you prefer to play with one of these educational geography toys versus GI Joe?"

Automatron is difficult to review because it's a DLC which pisses me off and yet has some pretty good moments. Over at CD Projekt Red, they give away dozens of tiny little DLC which I would have been willing to pay a few bucks for and I appreciate them for that kind of fanservice. Their DLC, "Blood and Wine" and "Heart of Stone" are effectively 20 hour expansions which as far as I'm concerned, qualify as legitimate games in their own right which could have been sold in stores with no problem on my part. Hell, I've often commented that I wish they'd just release smaller Fallout and Dragon Age games than try these 100+ hour things.

Automatron pisses me off, though, because it's a shameless cash-in on the gamer as you have this series of three or four adventures with a couple of dungeons at the end. The entire thing is really just a cover for the damned "Robot Maker" supplement which Bethesda thinks, like the Settlement System, is something I give a shit about.

I don't like Crafting, I don't like Mods (Armor or Weapons), and I don't want to build a bunch of Robot settlers. Maybe I might want to BUY some Protectrons as settlers and send them to supplement my ONE Settlement but I don't want to fucking spend MORE time gathering garbage to make a body for Codsworth. The design philosophy behind the game is giving a few quests and a story for those who actually enjoy, you know, PLAYING FALLOUT and then forcing you to go through all the crap the DLC is trying to get you enjoyed in.

I enjoyed the Automatron quest, I enjoyed seeing the Mechanist again (after a fashion), and I like the idea of having a Factory of My OwnTM. As a man who wants to rebuild the Commonwealth, it'd be great! You know, except for the fact it's a FACTORY POWERED BY HUMAN BRAINS.

Jesus, seeing all those RoboBrains working at the computer console horrified me at the end! Why the fuck would I want to operate this factory unless I was a psychopath? You just put me through a asylum of poor mentally ill people put to death and harvested for parts. That's some Hitler level shit, there! Did the Hispanic teenage roboticist not not notice that crap? In any case, it's not long enough to matter as the entirety of the Season Pass experience is mostly taken up by trying to turn a first person shooter RPG into Minecraft.

I liked Ada and the twist but....honestly, I wouldn't have bought this without the story mission and that just leaves a bunch of stuff I'll never use. I feel cheated in a way because the focus on the damn crafting in it and the other craft-based DLC felt like this took up the space which should have been devoted to making a third and fourth expansion pack. If I was referring the story, I might give it an eight out of 10 but it's the sheer waste of it that spoiled the experience. It was also poorly balanced for someone not wearing Power Armor and focused on keeping us from actually playing Fallout to playing Modder.

4/10

Yeah, cool, whatever. None of that matters though because the ultimate measure of the game is if you had fun or not. Did you have fun, Phipps?
 
Yeah, cool, whatever. None of that matters though because the ultimate measure of the game is if you had fun or not. Did you have fun, Phipps?

Fuck no!

I actually feel negative fun for playing through the story.

Like I devoted my time to playing it far longer than I should have when I could have been writing...I dunno, my actual books. It almost made me regret playing Fallout 4 again. Thank God for Far Harbor and Nuka World. I'd hate for that sour taste to be in my mouth as my last Fallout 4 experience. It's why I don't want to play Vault-Tec because if I do, I worry that will be my last experience of the game world.

Curse you, Bethesda! Not even speaking as the Shroud to the Mechanist made this fun!
 
Fuck no!

I actually feel negative fun for playing through the story.

Like I devoted my time to playing it far longer than I should have when I could have been writing...I dunno, my actual books. It almost made me regret playing Fallout 4 again. Thank God for Far Harbor and Nuka Cola.

I'd hate for that sour taste to be in my mouth as my last Fallout 4 experience.

Okay. Then do me a favour and use the fucking Phipps Scale.

Y'know, you design a deep and nuanced grading system, you name it after someone annoying and they don't even give you the courtesy of using the damn thing. I don't even know why I bother, Phipps. You tell me why. Tell me!
 
Okay. Then do me a favour and use the fucking Phipps Scale.

Y'know, you design a deep and nuanced grading system, you name it after someone annoying and they don't even give you the courtesy of using the damn thing.

I did not have fun.

0/1

Thank you for doing me the courtesy of creating the Phipps Scale, Crossfire. I feel honored and would like to use it for you.

Fallout 1 1/1

Fallout 2 1/1

Fallout 3 2/1 (I'm sorry, I just can't help myself)

Mothership Zeta 1/1

The Pitt 1/1

Point Lookout 1/1

Broken Steel 1/1 *

* Without Broken Steel, Fallout 3 actually is a 0/1 and the change causes it to become one of my favorite video games of all time. Fallout 3's climax is shit, Liberty Prime or not, and the ending is infamous for a reason. It wasn't as bad as Mass Effect 3 but in the way being shot in the leg is better than being shot in the crotch.

Fallout: New Vegas 2/1

Dead Money 0/1

Old World Blues 1/1

Honest Hearts 1/1

Lonesome Road 0/1 *

I'm back and forth on this because it's such a depressing and nihilistic story but that's the point.

Fallout 4 1/1

Fallout: Automatron 0/1

Contraptions and other settlement crap 0/1

The Vault Tech (because I won't even play it) N/A

Fallout: Far Harbor 1/1

Fallout: Nuka World 2/1
 
Yeah, I try to measure how much fun basically from 5-10.

5 is the bare minumum to get me to play. Anything lower and I'll just quit.

6 is fun but not really and you're better off with something else.

7 is fun and worth playing, 8 is a GOOD game.

9 is an excellent game.

10 is a game I loved and will cherish.

Why even bother using a scale of 1-10 then?
 
Do you think this is a fucking game? That isn't how this works.

No, no, you're doing it wrong.

[A] Do you think this is a fucking game? That isn't how this works.

*Speech Check successful*

---------+5 Experience

Alright, alright!

Fallout 1 1/1

Fallout 2 1/1

Fallout 3 1/1 (I'm sorry, I just can't help myself)

Mothership Zeta 1/1

The Pitt 1/1

Point Lookout 1/1

Broken Steel 1/1 *

* Without Broken Steel, Fallout 3 actually is a 0/1 and the change causes it to become one of my favorite video games of all time. Fallout 3's climax is shit, Liberty Prime or not, and the ending is infamous for a reason. It wasn't as bad as Mass Effect 3 but in the way being shot in the leg is better than being shot in the crotch.

Fallout: New Vegas 1/1

Dead Money 0/1

Old World Blues 1/1

Honest Hearts 1/1

Lonesome Road 0/1 *

I'm back and forth on this because it's such a depressing and nihilistic story but that's the point.

Fallout 4 1/1

Fallout: Automatron 0/1

Contraptions and other settlement crap 0/1

The Vault Tech (because I won't even play it) N/A

Fallout: Far Harbor 1/1

Fallout: Nuka World 1/1
 
No, no, you're doing it wrong.

[A] Do you think this is a fucking game? That isn't how this works.

*Speech Check successful*

---------+5 Experience

Alright, alright!

Fallout 1 1/1

Fallout 2 1/1

Fallout 3 1/1 (I'm sorry, I just can't help myself)

Mothership Zeta 1/1

The Pitt 1/1

Point Lookout 1/1

Broken Steel 1/1 *

* Without Broken Steel, Fallout 3 actually is a 0/1 and the change causes it to become one of my favorite video games of all time. Fallout 3's climax is shit, Liberty Prime or not, and the ending is infamous for a reason. It wasn't as bad as Mass Effect 3 but in the way being shot in the leg is better than being shot in the crotch.

Fallout: New Vegas 1/1

Dead Money 0/1

Old World Blues 1/1

Honest Hearts 1/1

Lonesome Road 0/1 *

I'm back and forth on this because it's such a depressing and nihilistic story but that's the point.

Fallout 4 1/1

Fallout: Automatron 0/1

Contraptions and other settlement crap 0/1

The Vault Tech (because I won't even play it) N/A

Fallout: Far Harbor 1/1

Fallout: Nuka World 1/1

You forgot the Sarcastic option.
 
Ever thought of applying for a job at IGN, Phipps?

I'd prefer to work for Piper's newstand and that would require my coworker to be a twelve year old girl and for me to handwrite my notes.

Wait a damn minute....she has a printer, why are all of her newspapers handwritten?

MINUS -2 POINTS TO THE SCORE!

:)
 
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I'd prefer to work for Piper's newstand and that would require my coworker to be a twelve year old girl and for me to handwrite my notes.

Wait a damn minute....she has a printer, why is all of her newspaper handwritten?

MINUS -2 POINTS TO THE SCORE!

:)

Consistent inconsistency of the game world would easily net a -1 or -2.
 
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